Swish and Filk – Potter Style Filks and such

Keeper of the Keys

artwork by borogove13.

Listen here: Keeper of the Keys

Written and performed by Snape44, to the tune “Master of the House” from “Les Misérables”, by Claude-Michel Schönberg

Hagrid
Welcome, firs’ years, gather around
off to the boats and sit yourself down
floatin’ along across the lake
might want to mind the friends that you make
Seldom do you see giant men like me
A gent of good intent who’s content to be

Master of the grounds, keeper of the keys
recognizes simple wisdom one sees
moleskin overcoat full of little mice
May look mad and hairy, but in fact, I’m nice
Glad to do a friend a favor
Always try to make things right
But watch out for the creatures
Each of them has got a little bite

Master of the grounds, keeper of the keys
sees the good in scary creatures no one sees
even Hippogriffs obey my commands
Got a giant spider from a far off land
Every body loves old Hagrid
Everybody’s giant mate
I even asked Hermione
Blimey, aren’t magical creatures great!

Hagrid & Gryffindors
Master of the grounds, quick to keep a pet
never met a creature that I didn’t like yet
Checkin’ on the grounds, lock the castle gate
Comforter philosopher, and life long mate!
Everybody’s boon companion
Everybody’s chaperone

Hagrid
But even after wine, oh
I know, dragons I can’t keep at home!

[To Harry on his doorstep...]
Enter Harry, Put down your cloak
Sure you won’t find no friendlier bloke
We’ve talked a lot about that curse
But after all it can’t get much worse

Hogwarts is me home, Hogwarts magic school
But I’m not quite alone, I’ve got Fang and you

Friends beyond compare, friends beyond belief
don’t care I’m half giant, they don’t give my grief
Don’t forget of course Fluffy is me pet
Play a bit of music you’ll get by him yet

Bloody! I should not’ve said that,
Shouldn’t talk o’ stuff like that
But when I get to drinking, I forget
completely where I’m at!
Can’t say I can cook, never read a book
Once I closed the cabin door, the whole place shook

Want a cup o’ tea, rock cakes fer ya too
Come on in and tell me everything that’s new
When it comes to keeping creatures
There are lots of tricks I know
They may start small and furry get big in a hurry,
‘Mazin’ how the little creatures grow!

Hagrid & Gryffindors
Master of the grounds, quick to keep a pet
never met a creature that I didn’t like yet
Checkin’ on the grounds, lock the castle gate
Comforter philosopher, and life long mate!

Everybody’s boon companion
Gives ‘em everything he’s got

Hagrid
Any kind of creatures
Each is special and I love the lot!