Swish and Filk – Potter Style Filks and such

Teach Your Weasley Children Well

artwork by nyxsiris

Best Female Performance / Best Group Performance

Listen here: Teach Your Weasley Children Well

Written by Nina, performed by Nina, Ann, with MJ and the Scribbulus editors
To the tune of “Teach Your Children” by Crosby, Stills, Nash, & Young

Here’s how it all began
The Weasley clan
Is such a great one,
See all that flaming hair
Don’t have a care
They live to have fun

Teach your children well
The greatest spell’s
to know they’re alright
And keep them safe from harm
From jinx or charm
From curse or ghost knight

When you’ve got seven like us
You’ll fret and stress and fuss
But you worship them and thus
You know they love you

(Spoken: “Put those Muggle toys down Arthur, we’re recording a song”)

There’s Bill, the oldest one
The perfect son
Reckless there’s no doubt
And Charles, who is abroad
And getting clawed
By Swedish Short Snouts

Teach your children well
The greatest spell’s
to know they’re alright
And keep them safe from harm
From jinx or charm
Dragon or Wolf bite

When they fly the nest one day
don’t be standing in their way
just hold your heart and pray
and know they love you

(Spoken: “How many of the kids are coming home for the holidays Molly?”
“Six”
“Six? Who is not coming?
“Who do you think!?”)

Percy (our son Percy)
Ignatius (is a good kid)
His greatest plus (he just needs to)
Is that he’s a smart guy (open his eyes)
But he’s (but he is)
different from us (not like us)
Like Icarus (Like Icarus)
He may fly too high (he may just fly too high)

Teach your children well
The greatest spell’s
to know they’re alright
And keep them free from fear
Their brothers’ jeers
Lure of the wrong side

Don’t you ever say goodbye
When they leave the Order’s side
You’ll not understand why
Just know they love you

(Spoken: “Oh Arthur, it’s “Mortal Peril” again for all seven hands of the clock”)

Our twins, who like to joke
And to provoke
Are such a worry
And Ron, the youngest boy
Will lose love’s joy
If he doesn’t hurry

Teach your children well
The greatest spell’s
to know they’re alright
Keep them from the Dark Side
God knows we’ve tried
But still they will fight

Just one girl in our nest
Follows Harry on his quest
It’s hard but we are blessed
Because we love them

(Spoken: “ok let’s try this again and try to stay in tune this time Arthur!”
“Hey, you’re no Celestina Warbeck yourself you know”)